Sleepless Nights

For those of you waiting for more europe its coming I promise. I've been really busy! 

Well, I can't sleep. I had someone tell me today heartbreak is never easy. 

So here is to sleepless nights, crying and finding my way out of this place into a better one. 

To learning about myself and relationships.
To knowing better the next time around.
To accepting that there is going to be another time around with someone else.
To wanting to change.
To being single. 

To quoting Elizabeth Gilbert, "People think soul mate is your perfect fit, and that's what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that's holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life. A true soul mate is probably the most important person you'll ever meet, because hey tear down your walls and smack you awake. But live with a soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful. Soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then they leave. and thank God for it. Your problem is, you just can't let this one go...... problem is, you can't accept that this relationship had a real short shelf life. " Eat Pray Love. (page 149) and believing every word she is saying.

To wishing I could disappear for awhile and everyone will stop asking. 

But the reality still stands, Sleeping even though I hate the dreams is necessary. I can't disappear, so I can have fun with my answers to "how is he?" "how are you?"(not the friendly momentary answer the deep answer version) my current new answers:

question # 1: Who's he? oh yeah him that guy with the face the hair and the eyes? oh him! he is great!

 question # 2: I am thinking about joining a convent! or moving to alaska so I can watch fish swim which ever I get to first I suppose.... I might even sit down in one place for a whole day and yell really loudly, at least  until I get bored. 

and I am keeping busy, so dont be offended if I don't respond to your call right away, or shoot a text right back. I am here just not that second! 

So I wish anyone out there who can't sleep either the best of luck!!!  This girl has to work tomorrow:D so sounds of the rain a sleep mask and thinking of being in Austria on a Bike!!!!

picture of evidence of lack of sleep!